Is there anything beer can’t do?– Hank Hill
gayhumanbones replied to your photo: This one goes out to Kenneth. fuck you, adrian Why are you jelly? I take requests. <3
So, I've been so on top of my vocabulary game...
me, talking about college: Yeah, education is just a total farce.
me, talking about possibly giving up cigarettes 4 life: And I mean it'll be me giving up something that's just so detrimental.
me, talking to my sexy former math teacher I had freshmen year of college, who I recently saw at a bar: Well, I'm exponentially happy.
hereyeislazy asked: You are my light. The reason I get up in the morning. I do everything with regards to you and your well-being. You are my heart and soul. My oxygen. You...are...my...everything.
readebruno: everybody seems to be getting some but me
While walking down my street...
Me: its such a fucking nice day today.
My tentative roommate, Candace: Yeah. It makes me wanna work out indoors.
Me: Yeah, I was gonna spend it on Tumblr.
BEST MOM MOMENTS 2011
me, on the phone: who's home with you right now?
my mom: your ugly ass fat ass sister
1nightinparis: im so glad someone made a video of this i thought it was so fucking weird when i watched it on tv